The Loneliness of Being in Love

Hi guys! I apologize for not updating in forever. School has just been really hectic, I had no time. Anyway, I would like to share with you a short story I wrote for my creative writing class. As you can probably tell by the title of this post, the story is called The Loneliness of Being in Love. Fun fact, this is actually the simpler and shorter version of the story the initial story I wrote. I hope you guys like it.

“Jason?” I asked setting my pen down.

“Yes?”

“I know this is a stupid question, but do you love me?” I questioned nervously.

“Yeah, why?”

“I don’t know, sometimes I don’t feel like you do,” I said avoiding his eyes.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, we barely spend time together anymore and –“

“What are you talking about? I’m spending time with you now.”

“I know, but we don’t hang out like we used to. I mean I understand you’re busy with exams and the soccer team, but I feel like I don’t matter anymore,” I said looking down at my hands and playing with my bracelet.

“What are you talking about? You think I don’t love you? I’ve always been there for you. Just because we don’t spend time together doesn’t mean I don’t love you.”

“We haven’t spent time together in about 4 months! It’s either you’re too busy with school, the soccer team or your friends. And I’m not upset that you have those things. I just feel left out when they are your priority and not me,” I said trying to keep my voice steady.

He sighed, “Sarah, what do you want me to say? You –“

“Nothing,” I said getting up quickly and gathering my things, “I want you to say nothing. You know what, I have to go. My mom wanted me home for dinner,” I said as made my way to the door.

“You want to leave fine! Leave!” I heard Jason say.

It was pouring outside when I got in my car. It was really hard to see the road and to tell you the truth I had no idea where I was going. I was just driving. Driving and thinking. I was thinking about everything, about us, about the first time I knew I liked him. It was Thursday night and we were working on an English project together. We didn’t know each other well and I was nervous. We were working at Jason’s place. He kept pitching ideas and I would either nod my head in response or shrug. He was writing some notes down when his pen died and he snatched mine from my hands.

“Hey! Give it back!”

“No.”

I went to grab it, but he kept it out of my reach. I was getting frustrated and after a while he put the pen down and started tickling me.

“Stop it!” I yelled laughing. He stopped and helped me up.

“Come with me, we’re going somewhere,” he said.

“What about the project?” I asked raising an eyebrow.

“Forget about the project for now.”

“Where are we going?”

“You’ll see,” he simply said with a smile.

We arrived at a board game cafe, “What are we doing here?” I asked puzzled.

“You know, you ask a lot of question for a girl who doesn’t talk much,” he said lightly, “and we are here because we are going to get to know each other and have some fun.”

“Hum, okay,” I said nervously.

Jason picked out the game Othello and set it in front of us.

“Othello?” I asked.

“What’s wrong with Othello?”

“Nothing, I’m just curious as to why you picked that game.”

“It’s a good game to play and talk at the same time.”

“So tell me about yourself Sarah,” he said while setting up the game.

“What do you want to know?” Was my response.

“What are you scared of?”

“Easy, spiders,” I said.

“No Sarah, what are you really afraid of?”

I sighed, “Of being alone, I’m afraid of being alone and that people won’t like me if they get to know who I really am.”

“So what about you? Tell me something about Jason.” I said trying get the focus off of me.

“I make it a point to be honest, because I was hurt by people who weren’t so honest with me.”

What he said struck me. I love his honesty and the way he was comfortable with talking about his feelings. It made me trust him and open up to him more. We spent the night playing board games and telling each other stories until it was time to go home.

“Thanks for dropping me off,” I said to Jason as we walked up to my house.

“It’s my pleasure.”

“Thank you for taking me out. I have got to admit that it was the most fun I have had in quite a long time.”

“I’m glad you did because I did too,” he said smiling, “Have a good night Sarah.”

“You too.”

I couldn’t sleep that night. I was too busy thinking about Jason. He was so honest it made me want to be that honest. It made me want-

A honk pulled me out of my thoughts. I swerved off the road trying to avoid the car that was heading towards me. The last thing I remember was hitting a tree before everything went black.

© 2015, Lia, all rights reserved

Feel free to tell me what you think by posting a comment below :).

Lots of love,

Lia