Taking Control

Hey guys!

So the reason that I don’t post any of my stuff on my blog is because of how easy people can steal what you write. But I’ve seen a very brave girl do it, so why not give it a shot. This poem is about struggling with depression and the darkness that’s inside some of us. Well I hope you like it.

I sit on the sidewalk

Watching the world pass me by

Not completely understanding how they do it

It seems so easy for them

I’m confused and angry

I want to scream

But not a sound comes out

I’m sitting on the sidewalk

Wondering how I got to this dark place

I thought that everything was going to be okay

They kept saying that life would get easier someday

But it’s hard to see the silver lining

Around walls that are closing in

I feel everything getting darker

My fears getting bigger

My stomach getting tighter

My parents saying try harder

My friends don’t have a clue

My family doesn’t know

That I’m suffering inside

But I don’t mind

I enjoy feeling this way

I don’t know who I am anymore

I lost interest in the things I used to love

I’m afraid

I’m afraid of who I am

Of who I am becoming

A part of me wants to give in

Wants to embrace the darkness

That is calling my name

I don’t know what else to do

I want to be happy

But I forgot how

I want to break free

Of the fears that control me

The harder I try to get out

The harder I try to fight

The deeper I drown

The fire inside of me is slowly burning out

I’m feeling so tired

Tired of running

Tired of fighting

Tired of hurting

I want to give up

When I am about to surrender

A voice inside my head

Keeps telling me to get it together

To try harder to get better

Not just for me

For my family

Because I know it’s hard for them too

So I pull myself back up every time I fall

I’ve stopped running away from everything that I fear

I don’t have to be afraid

I can choose to fight

I can choose to stay

Just when I think I’ve won

I see a bigger battle ahead

Because the thought of going back

Is always at the back of my mind

But now I am stronger than I ever was before

Now I am taking control of my fears

I’m slowly breaking free

Of the battle inside of me

I am finally choosing to let go

I am choosing to shine

I’m going to paint my world in colour

I’m going to make it my dream

I’m becoming the person I want to be

© 2015, Lia, all rights reserved

Feel free to let me know what you think by commenting on this post. 🙂

Lots of love

Lia

Mini shopping spree

Hey guys!!

I went shopping today! I went to Bath and Body Works. There I bought about 5 candles. They smell sooo good. I bought hand cream and a body lotion. I’m sorry I can’t tell you what They are called exactly. Other than that I bought Glitter & Gold tea from David’s Tea. I also got the latest Halestorm cd – Into The Wild Life and some earphones from HMV. My friend and I went to a restaurant that serves everything chocolate called Cacao 70.

So where do you guys usually shop? What kind of things do you usually get? Let me know by commenting on this post. 🙂

Lots of love

Lia

Paper Towns

Hey guys!

After everyone has been talking about how amazing Paper Towns by John Green is, so I finally got around to getting the book. I have not read it yet because I still have to finish City of Heavenly Fire by Cassandra Clare. I had to restart the book because I accidentally lost my page. I know the movie of the book Paper Towns is coming out this July. Who’s excited for it? I’d also like to know how did you liked the book for those who’ve read it.

What are your thoughts on Paper Towns? Let me know by commenting on this post. 🙂

Lots of love

Lia

Girls Are Like Apples On Trees Quote

Hey guys!

I’m back!! & I’m sick… Anyway, I would like to share one of my favourite quotes. I just learned today that the quote is from Pete Wentz from the band Fall Out Boy. Humm.. You learn something new everyday! Anyway, here is the quote:

“Girls are like apples… The best ones are at the top of the trees. The boys don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples that are on the ground that aren’t as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think there is something wrong with them, when, in reality, they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who’s brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree…”

I personally love this quote. I found it years ago and it’s still one of my favourites so far. I guess I was just one of those girls and it gave me hope that someday I’ll find the right guy…

So what’s your favourite quote and why?

Lots of love

Lia